Logan

Yesterday was Logan's mid-year preschool parent teacher conference.  We've been so pleased with his preschool, and more importantly, his progress since being in preschool.  I've talked so many times about our challenges with Logan; he's been in speech therapy since 20 months for a slight speech delay. As a result of the speech delay, he's always been more easily frustrated and sensitive.  We, at times, have really had to dig deep and conjur up an extra five doses of patience to help Logan learn how to regulate his emotions and teach him how to be a good friend, a good brother and make the right choices.  I've talked about Life with Logan a fair amount on the blog, but I've tried not to whine too much.  For all the challenges and tears, and feeling consumed and desperate at times, there are also so many days full of laughter and triumphs. 

I'm proud of him everyday. But this week I am particularly super duper extra proud.

I was apprehensive about starting him in preschool as a young 3-year old this past fall.   I didn't know how he'd react when another child took his toy, told him 'no' or if someone he was talking to wasn't able to understand him.  I didn't know if he'd follow directions, or obey the rules.  At the same time, we felt it would be an exciting experience for him, to gain more independence and confidence, and it would give me a break a couple of mornings a week for mental recovery.   So, we decided to give it a go.

Through the school months, I've had many conversations with his lovely teacher.  We also decided to get a little extra help when we hit a rough spot a while back found a behavioral therapist to help him and just as importantly, to help us help him.  Not something I talked about on the blog, it just really seemed like a personal thing and not something I wanted to take public.   But I'm here to say that everything we've done - all the appointments, all the testing, even all the drives up to Kennedy Krieger in the early days...., all the discussions and books and everything, everything.  Its been completely worth it, 100%.

Yesterday, Logan's teacher sang his praises and told us how much he is thriving at preschool.  He's not had any issues controlling himself at school.  He is learning to write his name.  He can recognize almost every letter of the alphabet on his own, and he knows all of his shapes, colors and numbers to 20.    He can spell his name.   He goes to music class and participates and uses his manners.  He initiates communication with his teachers and friends, and sits still and pays attention.  He's wonderful at sharing, at following directions and his verbal skills have completely taken off.  In fact, so much so he's probably going to be released from speech therapy next month.  He was released from behavioral therapy today since he's met all of the goals we had set for him.  Its been quite an incredible, monumental week for him.

He's worked hard, we've worked hard, and its paid off.  Its been a long road, and not an easy one.  The child we have today is much happier, communicating his thoughts and feelings and making friends on his own.  He enjoys who he is and is proud of his abilities. 

This has been a huge learning experience for us as parents.  I've come to believe you have such a small window before certain behaviors and cycles become part of who a child is and become hard to 'undo'; before small delays turn into bigger delays when they're older and are noticed by other kids.  What I've learned in the past two years is get your child help as soon as you feel they need it.  Don't wait.  While it might be hard to acknowledge you're child isn't perfect, it will be much harder later in life if you haven't given them the skills they need to be happy and independent.  And if no one will give you the services, fight for them.  We were always told Logan's speech delay was so slight he barely qualified for services.  But we fought for him and got him help. Because how happy can a child be who can't always be understood when he's talking?  How happy can a child be who can't settle himself down when he gets upset? 

Because bottom line, he is our child and we weren't going to settle for waiting to see if it all just worked out one day. 

I've never been as sure as anything as I am of this.  There is no shame in getting help for your child.  Logan will never remember he had speech or self regulation issues.  He's just 3 1/2.  He won't remember all these hundreds of sessions of speech therapy and behavioral therapy.    What he'll know is that he's a happy, loving, smart boy who feels good about himself and can do anything he sets his mind to.  One that makes friends easily, cares for people and makes good choices in life.

My heart overflows for you, Logan, and you get more amazing every single day.